Who's that guy?
The rules are simple: Good films are awarded a number of T-Bird jackets in correlation with the film's level of quality. So "Toy Story" "Star Wars" Episodes 3-6, "Jurassic Park", "Raiders of the Lost Ark", "The Godfather, part 2" -- these films would all get 5 T-Bird jackets.
Watchable-but-not-great movies like "Star Trek 3: The Search For Spock", "Bruce Almighty", "So I Married an Axe Murderer", the "Die Hard" sequels -- these would get fewer T-Bird jackets.
Bad movies are not given T-Birds, but rather Pink Ladies jackets. The more Pink Ladies, the worse the film. So the Fantastic Four movie would get at least 3 Pink Ladies, if not more. Bicentennial Man: 5 Pink Ladies. Star Trek V: 4 Pink Ladies. Highlander 2 The Quickening: 5 Pink Ladies.
OK, so it's really just a cleverly disguised 1-10 rating system, but -- I still fully expect it to someday supplant Ebert's thumb gimmick.